I love giving advice. I love it when people say, wow! thanks! You are SO smart! How did you EVEN KNOW that?
Well, I’ll tell you. Lots and lots of reading, asking, and doing it wrong. I used to be wrong, sometimes.
Like the time I thought it was ok to leave your 18 month old alone in your newly cleaned apartment while you shower.
Or the time I thought a wrap-dress was a good idea for church with young children. (People still talk about how I ‘flashed’ about 2/3 of the congregation.)
I was also wrong once, when I thought teenagers needed LESS supervision than 18 month olds.
But mostly, I’m right.
Today’s how-to is going to focus on the promised subject of:
Understanding Men
There are 3 things men really want:
1. Food
2. You know what
3. Someone to make food and give them you know what.
There are 3 more things men sort of want:
1. Sports
2. Money
3. The main-squeeze in their life to be happy so they will get food, sports, and You Know What.
Once you know what they want, you can get what you want. Here’s how:
GIVE THEM WHAT THEY WANT
Then, they will watch sports and you can do what you want.
Seriously, if you want men to help around the house, give them what they want. A man who’s being flirted with, and smiled at in an interesting way is a lot more likely to vacuum than one whose partner is screaming, “YOU NEVER VACUUM!”
Cookies and Pot Roast are gateway foods. They lead to Laundry, and the buying of shoes and purses.
Men are not stupid. They are people. And people like to do things for people who are fun, appreciative and willing to reciprocate.
Women want lots of complicated things, like long talks about their relationships, and the exact perfect present that somehow says, “I love you, you are the most beautiful woman in the whole world, including Hollywood and I worship the ground you walk on and money is no object with me as far as you are concerned”, and romance without sex after marriage.
Why not try doing what he likes to get what you want?
It’s not dumb, or pandering, or a lack or women’s rights.
It’s the Golden Rule.
Do unto men as you would have men buy you shoes.
Er…
Almost.
