Guilty Gardening

I can’t worry about Barry Manilow, or his concerts today…maybe all week!  I have a more pressing problem, that is requiring my immediate attention.  It may stop raining here someday and I will Have To garden. I know, I said, “Have To”.It’s not the typo you are thinking it is.  If you know anything, and I’m sure you know lots and lots of great stuff, you know that: Even though there are things you don’t love to do, you must still do them. (That’s a life lesson right there, people) Where I live, Here, it is actually a requirement for residents to grow tomatoes and zucchini. The veggie police patrol the suburbs and if you are not producing the required quota of these two specimen in particular, you are escorted out of the state.

Ok, so I’m fibbing. Sort of. You don’t get escorted out, but you may be judged, by a jury of your peers, with comments like:

“Oh, you didn’t plant this year? Well, I guess we all have our priorties, bless your heart.”

It’s the blessing that is killing me. Because, you can say anything you want about someone if you bless their heart. (ei, ‘She’s just put on so much weight, bless her heart’, or ‘He can’t seem to find a job, bless his heart’) We all know what they mean. You didn’t quite cut it, did ya?

ANYWAY, my plan was to clean out one gardening bed (we have 5) and plant one 4 pack of tomatoes, and a zucchini plant.

I went to the nursery. I wish they wouldn’t call it that…all those baby plants, motherless, waiting to be adopted by the right plant mommy. Which, as it turns out, was me.

I now am the dubiously proud mama of 12 tomato plants, 4 zucchini, 2 cucumber, 4 peppers, watermelon, pumpkin, peas, green beans and carrot seeds, and about 8 different herbs.

Unfortunately, Blair suffers from the same problem, and while I was frantically saving baby vegetables, he was at the dump saving the lives of innocent flowers. You SO just heard that right:) He was taking a load of yard crap to the Green Waste for a neighbor. Beside him, in a Very Large Truck, was a guy callously dumping hundreds of petunias and lobelia into the waste pile. When Blair asked about it, he said they were ‘too old’ and ‘nobody wants them’. So he did the only thing he could do! He gathered up as many as he could and brought them home.

For me to plant. Somewhere.

Sigh.

You can see how even the most talented celebrity must take a back seat to tender infant plants, waiting anxiously to be nestled into the fertile ground, and nurtured lovingly (or not so lovingly) by me. After which I will spend my summer watering, weeding, pruning, picking, harvesting, cleaning, spraying, mulching, composting, bug-hunting, freezing, canning, drying…blah blah blah.

I may not like gardening, but I like living here. I’d hate to be evicted over a squash:)

A couple of notes:

1. Thanks to everyone who stuck with us, and joined us last week:) I’ve made lots of new friends, and the blog (albeit oddly) got a ton of new traffic and visibility. I appreciate that, ladies!:)

2. Follow us, and comment on Wednesday (I’ll remind you) and we’ll throw all your names in a hat (or a bowl, or whatever I can find) and pick one and send that lucky person a prize: a Gift Card and a Sahmsisters original bag. (Details on…you guessed it…Wednesday)

It’s our first ever Give-Away, so be ready:)

Also, Happy Memorial Day.