We Took Dance Lessons!

Blair and I took our first ever Ballroom Dance lesson on Saturday night. Which is interesting to me, because a) I do not have a history of grace and balance b)Blair does not have a history of grace and patience to learn new things and c) in the past, us dancing together usually leads to ill will and a fight. Undeterred by these small details Blair had said:

We should learn how to dance!

Me: What?

Him: Our friends, A and J are giving lessons in nearby town, we should go!

Me: What?

Him: It’ll be fun. I’ve been wanting to learn.

Me: What?

So we went. There was an advertised hour of instruction followed by 1 1/2 hours of dancing fun! Come learn the Fox Trot! Actually, every Saturday night, they learn a new dance step or review the one learned the previously. On this Saturday night, there were only newcomers, so we began anew with the fox trot! (I can’t seem to stop putting an exclamation point on that)

It was, um, interesting. Both of us had an idea of how we thought it would go…

Him: How fun and romantic this will be!

Me: I hope this doesn’t end in some sort of legal mediation…

🙂

The first issue was the fact that the man leads. I get that, but this particular man has never danced before and since I have danced before, I felt more qualified to lead. Which of course is ridiculous, the lady does not EVER lead in Ballroom dance. (The instructor also reminded me of this… more than once) One couple was having some trouble with this wild concept and when the instructor gave them the whole ‘the gentleman always leads in dance’ speech the wife said, “But what if he’s WRONG?” I was curious about this also. The instructor said, “There is no Wrong. In Ballroom, he calls the shots. If he leads you there, you go.”

 Oh. Huh. Well.

And I thought about that.

I’ve always said there are lots of right ways to parent. And I suppose I would have to admit that there are lots of right ways to have a marriage. Crap. That means that Blair might be right more than I would care to admit. I mean, if it’s not illegal, or immoral, or involves snakes, it should be an idea that I am willing to try.

Wait just a cotton picking minute!

Is this a dance lesson or a marriage counseling class? I began to see shocking similarities.

Back to business.  Blair and I struggled for control of the whole ‘dance arm’ thing. Finally, we had to divide the arms up equally, each of us responsible for our own side. Blair took the lead arm side, which was his right and my left, and I took the hold hands side (my right, his left) He had been trying to lead me with his right and steer me with his left which was starting to wear my arm and shoulder out. I think he was thinking I was The Jeep (which he loves as much, if not more than I love my van, and I have often referred to it as his girlfriend) where the hand on my back was like the gear shift, while the hand holding mine was steering.

I was living in a deathly fear that I would suddenly find full grown man standing on my foot. And I was entertaining concerns that Blair would be so intent on learning the steps that he would not be watching where we were going  and I would hit a person/wall/post in the middle of the room. I wasn’t having a lot of trouble with the steps, just with being led/steered and trying to understand through subtle pressure on my back just what the heck he was planning next.  Occasionally, he didn’t actually know what he was planning next and there would be a minor crash. Blair liked those, because they seemed to result in my crashing into him, or losing my balance and him catching me. (Wait a minute….no no, I’m sure he wasn’t doing it on purpose)

The music was fun, all Frank Sinatra and other popular 50’s songs. I admit, I love Frank Sinatra stuff. Listening to those songs made me feel romantic and somehow able to dance. We were doing fine,with no incidents, accidents, hints, or allegations.  I had committed to myself that I would not criticize or complain, and had been desperately praying all day that this would not end in a fight.

It turned out to be fun. We are not Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire, but we somehow were able to let go of some of life’s more pressing problems and enjoy learning something new and getting some exersize.

And it looks like we’ll go back next week. I mean, dance lessons, Frank Sinatra and free marriage advice? Sounds like a deal to me:)