Manual vs Automatic

Ha! You probably think I am going to talk about cars. I will, most likely have something to blog about on the subject of cars, since I have been elected the Parent-Most-Likely-To-Have-To-Teach-Our-17-Year-Old-Daughter-To-Drive-A-Stick-Shift. It is either that, or *GASP* let her drive my baby, my van, which, as you well know, is my favorite possession….unless I had diamond earrings, in which case the van might come second. Might.

Today however, I would like to discuss the complicated structure that is our life. Not just my life, you all have this. There you are, merrily plugging away at your life, when all of a sudden, blam! U-turn! You are forced to change gears and become someone different.

Let me explain.

I wake up as Maren. Shower, dress, makeup. Then I head to the kitchen where I am Mom/Cook, unless there are problems and then I am Disaster Control, Note Writer, and Official Parental Signature.  I am a fashion consultant to teens. Then personal valet to young boys. Suddenly, I am Exit Specialist in charge of remembering every single scrap of paper children need to show up to school with. Then I am a bus aide, loading 2 boys onto their respective busses. In the meantime, I am also being Daycare Mom, taking in the morning’s attenders, answering parent questions, and managing a business.

Yesterday, I was Kindergarten Mom, taking my last little chick to his first day of Kindergarten. I knew I would be a bit emotional, but didn’t want to cry in front of the kid, he was already pretty nervous. So I planned to have my sob-fest in the van afterwards. Well, I realized when I got out to the van, that I also needed to run an errand and hurry back home to the daycare. I quickly sucked it up and mentally ran through the scheduled activity. Finished my errand….ok, ok, I got a Pepsi alright! Are you happy? Sheesh!….and went home.

Jessica, a new 7th grader at the local Jr high, had quickly fallen into her her Jr high school mess, and I’ve been sorting through that.

That’s a lot of gears! 1st gear-5th in an hour, and then overdrive. I’m pretty sure I used reverse about 6 times yesterday, and was in 4-wheel drive during a conversation with Jr High teacher.

I always wonder which gear is wife/lover? Because that ends up being part of my day, and a completely different gear than the others.

Maybe I’m using the word, ‘gears’ when I could be using the words, ‘Multiple-Personalities’.

Men have 3 gears: Hungry for food, Hungry for ‘not food’ and Sports. Some guys have a 4th gear that enables them to buy presents….

I guess what I’m thinking is, maybe I’ve converted over the years from a Manual to a Automatic transmission. I used to feel so yanked around by the different roles. One minute you’re making out with your sweetie and the next you’re cleaning up a midnight barf incident. One day you’re doing laundry and the next you’re doing taxes. One year you’ve got babies and the next year your baby is 20. It’s not the same being Nick’s mom as it is being Alex’s. Two very different things. And then there’s the girls and Dan, and Tim. And we’re back to Wife. Somehow it just happens by itself these days.

I’m dizzy. I need a Pepsi.